The Essence of Beauty

I have feminist tendencies but I love girly girl stuff.  I love the princess, diva, ballerina, you name it I love it.  Lucky for me I have 2 beautiful girls.  They have bright sparkling eyes, broad button noses, heart shaped full lips, and heads with tons of kinky curls.  They are a reflection of me (and hubby too, I guess).   I want them to see their own beauty for themselves and not just through my eyes.  It wasn’t enough that my mom told me I was beautiful every day, all I could see was my “flaws”.

Essence Magazine

 In an effort to reinforce their sense of beauty I have subscribed to Essence magazine.  Pages upon pages of Black women in every shade with every type of hair imaginable are scattered around my house.  This is not because I want my girls to be materialist fashonistas but because they need to see Black beauty in others so they can see it in themselves.  Images are powerful.  Influence extends farther than my reach.  Willow is whipping her braids and A loves to wear her hair in braids and whip them even though she is the only girl in her school with them.  I know the days are coming when they will want more than nothing else to conform.  I just hope I am laying a strong foundation in self appreciation so those days are short lived.

My New Venture

Satin Fuschia Princess Pillowcase

I have a passion for natural hair.  I was always interested in it, but didn't realize how important it is to appreciate and care properly for natural hair until A was born.  This has lead me to create satin pillowcases with designs for little girls. I was looking for satin pillowcases for my girls and realized they were all plain and boring solid colors.

Here is the link to my website Sleeping Little Divas and a link to my etsy shop Sleeping Little Divas on Etsy

Thank you for your support!

Denman vs. Tangle Teezer

I remember the first time I got my Denman brush.  It literally moved through my hair like butter.  No fighting, no fussing, no more tangles. :) If a wide tooth comb and a paddle brush hooked up and had a baby it would be a Denman  During my transition from relaxed to natural hair I shared my Denman with A and it worked as well on her hair as it did on mine.  Then about a year ago I happened upon the Tangle Teezer It was all a buzz online and constantly sold out at Sally's. It was months before I could get my hand on one. When I finally did it replaced my Denman for A.

It worked great but a year later I'm starting to have some reservations. I used it to detangle my hair one time and the brush pulled away from the handle - not good - and I haven't been able to put back together the same way since.  It is good for thinner curls but if you're dealing with a thick head of 3b/4a ish type curls (thick and tight) your better bet is the Denman hands down.

I have since bought another Denman for A, I'm tired of sharing!

More Hair Stuff

I continue to refine my technique for maintaining A’s hair. The tightly curly method isn’t very practical for a toddler – at least the curl defining part. I was leaving her hair in double strand twist instead of trying to define each curl and that lasted much better through the first nap. I was also able to cornroll her hair with beads in the week leading up to the move. It lasted a week which was great, but the process of putting them in and taking them out took a couple of days.


Right now since she is doing so much swimming I am doing 3 ponytails, two in the front and one in the back. In the morning I spray her hair with water, put in conditioner and kinky curly and finger comb it. The parts are the same from the day before and I’ve decided I don’t care if her parts aren’t perfect these days. At night I take out the ponytail and make a braid then twist it into a sort of bandu knot. I have started not to braid her hair all the way to the ends and found that it’s easier to take out in the morning.

If she is doing some serious swimming then I just braid up her ponytail and make it into a bandu knot to keep her hair from getting tangled. I also did a similar style for myself at the pool the other day.

There isn’t much to report about my hair. I do as little to it as possible. Co-wash and condition every 3 days (when I have the time), I detangle after the shower instead of in it and have been using some homemade hair goop. That’s about it. If I had more time I could experiment with styles, but since E has started pulling my hair out in clumps (not exaggerating) my go to style is a pony tail.

Too Much?

For the first year of A’s life she had only enough hair to smooth with your hand. It wasn’t enough to make a pony tail until she was 16/17 months old. I was excited to “style” her hair with little braids, pony tails, two strand twists, and anything else I could think of. We reached a point in the early fall that I needed to budget 30mins in the morning to do her hair – what little hair there was. I’d been reading natural hair blogs and trying to do protective styles on A’s hair; the problem was that no style lasted more than a day and although I was careful I still saw more hair in the brush than what I was comfortable with.


So now that I’ve done a little bit more reading online ;) I’m taking more of a laid back approach to A’s hair. I’m going to treat her hair more like I treat my own in terms of styling and manipulation. No more tight pony tails and perfectly sectioned parts. Last week I used the tightly curly method to define A’s curls and have been finger parting and two strand twisting them at night to keep the curls from frizzing out. In the morning I refresh the curls with my leave-in water mixture and seal with my coconut shea soufflé. I have been decorating her hair with head bands and barrettes.

I am in love with A’s defined curly fro. I hope my enthusiasm is contagious.

Living Naturally

I want to be natural. I am going natural. In different contexts these statements can mean very different things. I embrace both. I grow veggies in the summer, buy organic food for Baby, and try to eat minimally processed food as much as possible. I have also decided to no longer chemically alter my hair – thus, going natural.


It’s not the first time that I’ve made this decision, a couple of years ago I attempted to break free from the 8 week cycle of processing but gave up when it took 2 hours to comb and I didn’t know how to manage my actual hair.

So here I go at round 2, the last processed hold out among my friends and family and I’m ready to take the leap mostly for my little girl. I’m not going to process her hair and don’t want her to think that kinky/curly hair has something wrong with it that needs to be fixed. When I was a kid everyone I knew had chemically straightened hair – except me. I was so jealous of the easy time they had while I struggled for hours never satisfied with the results. I realize now that I didn’t have the tools or information about how to best manage my hair and I don’t want Baby to suffer through the same frustrations.

This time I have resources, information, and tools that I didn’t have before. I also have a hair style and a plan for growing my hair out and cutting (the BIG CHOP!) off the processed part.

Here are a few websites that have been passed on to me that I found helpful:
http://www.tightlycurly.com/welcome/
http://bglhonline.com/
http://nappturality.com/
http://www.mynhcg.com/
http://www.naturalblackhaircare.com/index.html
http://naturalsunshine.ning.com/?xg_source=badge

So I will keep you updated on my progress. So far there is nothing to report. I had my last touch-up early September, so that would make me almost 6 months out. I’m styling my hair in a twist out and using the tightly curly method. So far so good…